I recently went through some of my past journals reading about the experiences I’ve had since being diagnosed with PCOS in October 2016. While reading, I re-experienced the feelings of sadness, yearning to have a baby, and unanswered questions that I was going through.
It also reminded me some of the challenges I conquered and while daily doing my best to maintain a positive outlook on this trial I was experiencing.
It was good for me to revisit these experiences. In a way, it’s rejuvenated my desire to better take care of myself, but has also help me realize what I’ve learned from having PCOS.
I have PCOS, PCOS does not have me
After finding out I had PCOS, I started blaming PCOS for every hard thing going on in my life. It’s true that PCOS was a factor for a lot of the trials I was experiencing, but what wasn’t good was that I was identifying myself as a victim of PCOS and allowing it’s symptoms to become who I am rather than letting PCOS be apart of me and living my life fully despite the trials.
I don’t remember when I shifted my attitude on PCOS, but ever since I have not allowed it to dictate my life, I have had an overall health improvement mentally, emotionally, physically and PCOS is not something I am constantly moping over. I have decided to treat it like any challenge or goal I’m working on, and finding ways to conquer the symptoms, even though PCOS is with me forever.
PCOS is for Life
I was born with PCOS, but finding out I had it when I was 26 years old took some getting used to because I knew that adapting to a healthier, stricter lifestyle would help my symptoms and my overall health, but it was hard accepting that I couldn’t cure it from my body.
Something that has been a wake up call and drive for motivation for me in continually researching PCOS is that if I didn’t take care of myself and my symptoms, PCOS could lead to Diabetes.
This commitment to take better care of my health is not only for me to try and have a baby but for the rest of my life.
PCOS is diagnosed individually
PCOS is hard to diagnosed to a specific individual because everyone has different symptoms and results from these symptoms, so I can’t compare my struggle with anyone else. One of my dearest friends was diagnosed with PCOS, and was successful with getting pregnant on Clomid, my sister-in-law struggled to get pregnant for 8 years but has since had 5 successful pregnancies, I follow a few women on Social Media who struggle with severe weight gain, others irregular hair growth.
Obviously my biggest struggle was been to conceive however, I do struggle with regular menstrual cycles and have put on some weight that is like try to pull tar of the road to lose.
So with this, I have had to learn what’s best for me. What diet, exercise, mental health, and overall lifestyle because my experience with PCOS is going to be different from everyone else’s.
Discipline and Consistency
This part of my experience with PCOS has been a roller coaster, a really crazy roller coaster… because I’m human.
It takes discipline to keep up with good eating habits, exercising daily, taking medications and vitamins, maintaining a positive mindset, getting back up again and again after getting lazy with these habits and continuing forward.
When I’m consistent, I always feel better, even if I’m not getting the results I fully want, I always feel better. Every time I’ve look back at pictures in the last couple of years, I can always tell when I was living a disciplined and consistent life because I looked healthier.
Quite often on my social media, I share what I’ve learned through being patient, and how good it has been for me, and how much stronger I am now because of it, and I have learned a lot and grown as well, however I feel like sometimes I put it out there just so I can keep convincing myself to be patient, cause there are a lot of days when I really am ready to not be patient anymore.
I’m ready to start losing that extra 75 pounds that PCOS so willingly added to my waistline. I’m ready to have healthier hair. I’M READY TO HAVE MY BODY TO BE BABY HEALTHY.
But at the end of the day, somehow I continue to be patient.
I’m thankful for the ability to stay actively engaged in my life that I’ve been blessed with, to have a husband who keeps me on my toes (and lets me cry when I’m not having the best day), and truthfully I am thankful for what I continue to learn about PCOS , and myself (even on days when I’m tired of being patient). This is not the path I expected to be taking, but I know we will never be given trials and experiences that we can’t take on.
love, hannah jane
These are some articles that my Mom shared with me recently and I really enjoyed reading them: